When Esau realized how deeply his father Isaac disliked the Canaanite women, he went to Ishmael and married Mahalath the sister of Nebaioth and daughter of Ishmael, Abraham's son. This was in addition to the wives he already had. vs. 9 (the Message)
The call now might be to question authority or to be yourself but things haven't changed much over the years. Esau figured out how to get back at his parents by doing what he knew they didn't want to see happen. While I'm sure that very few of us who are reading this have ever done anything simply because we knew it would make someone else mad I'm sure that you know someone who has. Maybe it was a career path, or a relationship, a tattoo, or the clothes worn but it was an intentional choice to make someone else realize that they did not have control of the decisions that were made.
Everyone has a need to be able to exert their own independence and psychologists will say that in order to be healthy emotionally each person must break away from the childhood expectations and take ownership of their own decisions. The problem with Esau's decision and many of ours as well is that by choosing the opposite of what is expected we become trapped by the very expectations that we are trying to escape from. It is in the knowing of why we are drawn to make a particular decision that we actually become free to make the decision that might be best for us in which to honor God. This is hard work and one that many of us choose not engage in which leads to more pain for both others as well as ourselves.
Some thoughts to ponder and share with others:
- How do you think Isaac responded to Esau's decision to marry a Canaanite woman?
- How might Esau's new wife felt when she found out Esau married her to spite his father?
- Have you ever done something because you knew it was something that wouldn't be approved of by others? What was your act of rebellion?
- How can you tell if you are doing something because it is best for you rather than because of other people's expectations?
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